Drifting

Hello from my new home, my new university, my new life...

A short post for you all this evening, as I have class in the morning, but I wanted to write a little bit about where I've been in the last six weeks.

Moving away to university has turned out to be every bit as uncomfortable as I imagined, but thankfully not unbearable. My housemates are more or less congenial to one another, and I'm finding that my floormate and I are rather compatible. My classwork is challenging, but it feels so good to be learning from people who have been there and achieved the things I wish to achieve. (The fact that we talk about the value of blogging in almost every lecture doesn't hurt, either. ;)) Small blessings, to be sure.

The greatest blessing of all, though, is the Newman Center here. I've been with them for two weeks now, and have nothing but good to say about the people. They've been incredibly warm and immediately accepted me as one of the family, although it's going to take some time before true friendships begin to blossom. The best part is that I have access to Mass a few times a week, and several adults who are available for spiritual direction. I've just started praying about asking one to become my director. We're also discussing weekly Adoration, and I hope it happens! In the midst of all this chaos, I could really use some quiet time in His Presence.

My vocation is like a pendulum these days. One day I feel fine and at peace, and the next I feel like I'm drowning. Things in my personal life have made the way things stand currently very difficult, but I have no idea what the next step is for me. God has been particularly silent throughout this, but today at Mass, I got the slightest hint of the need to be patient, to step back and be close to Him. I am praying that everything will work out soon--I know that they will in God's time, but not knowing and being so uncomfortable has driven me very near insanity at times. ;) Still, I carry on every day, I try not to worry about the future, and I pray that God will continue to lead me in the direction I need to be. All I can really do is hold on for the ride.